What does the Bible say about Narcissim

Narcissism is the term used in psychology to describe a preoccupation with self. It is a Greek term taken from the name of the mythological Narcissus, who fell in love with his own image and was doomed to die because he would not turn away from it. A narcissist is a person who displays a high level of selfishness, vanity, and pride. He sees everything from a “how does this affect me?” perspective. Empathy is impossible for the narcissist because his only perspective is the one centered on self. In psychology, narcissism is seen as a broad spectrum of conditions ranging from normal to pathological.


The Bible says that we are born sinful since the fall (Romans 5:12). This means that we are born with only sinful tendencies and no ability to be “good” or righteous on our own. What we call “human nature” the Bible calls “the flesh” (Galatians 5:19-21). Part of our sin nature is a total focus on self. This focus, also called “egocentrism,” is how babies see and experience the world. Narcissism is like egocentrism in that the adult still relates to the world like an infant, a perspective that impedes personal growth and relationships.

Psychological theories about narcissism suggest that the narcissistic person uses defense mechanisms to idealize self so that he does not have to face his own mistakes (sin) or flaws (fallen state). The diagnosis of narcissistic personality disorder outlines the behavior patterns of a narcissistic person as being haughty, non-empathetic, manipulative, and envious; he also possesses a sense of entitlement and grandiosity. From a biblical perspective, it is clear that these heart conditions are due to pride, which is sin (Proverbs 16:18). The Bible tells us to “look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others” (Philippians 2:4). The narcissist routinely disobeys this command.

Pride is a reason people do not feel they need a savior or forgiveness. Pride tells them they are “good” people or have a “good” heart. Pride also blinds people to their own personal responsibility and accountability for sin. Narcissism (pride) masks sin, whereas the gospel reveals the truth that leads to remorse for sin. Narcissistic traits can be dangerous because, at their worst, they will lead a person to destroy others to satisfy the lust of the flesh (2 Timothy 3:2-8).

The Bible addresses the issues related to narcissism as part of our sinful natural self (Romans 7:5). We are slaves to the flesh until we place our faith in Jesus, who sets the captives free (Romans 7:14-25John 8:34-36). Believers are then slaves to righteousness as the Holy Spirit begins the transforming work of sanctification in their lives. However, believers must surrender to the Lord and humble themselves in order to have God’s perspective rather than a selfish one (Mark 8:34). The process of sanctification is turning away from self (narcissism) and turning toward Jesus.

All people are narcissists until they either learn how to cover it and get along in the world or until they recognize their own flesh and repent of their sin. The Lord helps people to grow out of narcissism when they receive Jesus as their savior (Romans 3:19-26). The believer is empowered to begin loving others as himself (Mark 12:31).
See more http://www.gotquestions.org/narcissism.html

Bible cure for narcissism

While Jesus’ popularity was growing, John the Baptist’s friends felt a little slighted for the prophet. John the Baptist however, said about Jesus, “He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less.” (John 3:30 NLT) John knew that God had appointed him to be the messenger to announce the coming of the “bridegroom,” who was Christ Himself, and he was content to play the role he had been given. 

Beholding Christ on the cross

Seeing Jesus on the Cross. Harry Anderson Image © Review & Herald Publishing from GoodSalt.com

After conducting a funeral for an elderly lady,  I was eating at the table with her grown children. Each one was talking about projects they had going on in their homes. I was surprised how easily their lives seemed to be moving on. I thought to myself, “If they can move on so easily after losing their mother, how quickly will people forget me after I die?” The thought was making me a little depressed. While they were talking among themselves, I quickly checked my Facebook under the table. And I saw that a friend had written, “Living my life so that people will remember me after I die is too small a cause to live for.” With the timing, I took that as a message straight from heaven. Had I been focusing more on God’s love like John the Baptist did, instead of myself, I probably would not have had that moment of insecurity and depression. 

Health professionals agree that a lack of feeling loved is what leads to insecurities and even narcissistic attitudes. Because John the Baptist was focused on God rather than self, he was overwhelmed by God’s love, and I believe that is the exact opposite of the focus of a narcissist who is insecure because of self-focus.

Below are signs, from the Mayo Clinic, that you or someone you know may be narcissistic. 1  The Mayo clinic says this is a rare mental disease. Some may wonder what their definition of “rare” is, since  narcissistic behavior seems to be becoming an epidemic. After each sign, I have provided a Bible passage which offers a cure or example for each sign of narcissism.

I don’t believe people intend to be narcissistic, and may not be aware of their narcissism. If this looks like you, please prayerfully consider the Bible verses and perhaps contact a Christian counselor for help.

If you are in a relationship with a narcissist, how you handle it needs to be determined by the nature of the relationship. In some cases, you may be able to deal with the relationship by leaning fully on Christ and getting your love and strength from Him. In other cases it may be so damaging that it becomes necessary to seek spiritual and maybe even professional counseling to find your best way out. Don’t be surprised if the narcissist makes him or herself look like the victim.

As well as providing the signs listed below to diagnose narcissism, the Mayo clinic also suggests a cause for the disease. They theorize that people who were not properly nurtured and cared for in the early stages of their life are more likely to become narcissists. If only these people realized how much God loves and cares for them!

Lucifer was loved and cared for in heaven, yet he played mind games with himself, until he brainwashed himself into thinking that nobody cared about him but himself. His only self-concocted shred of evidence was that God the Son outranked him. He felt ill-used because he did not have the position of Christ and thought, “What about me?!”

Meanwhile, Jesus, “Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to.” Philippians 2:6 NLT Instead of crying out “What about me!” Jesus has always cried out, “What about others!” Here are the signs of narcissism provided by the Mayo Clinic, along with the examples or cures found in the Bible.

  • Believing that you’re better than others

Biblical Response: Is there any encouragement from belonging to Christ? Any comfort from his love? Any fellowship together in the Spirit? Are your hearts tender and compassionate?

Then make me truly happy by agreeing wholeheartedly with each other, loving one another, and working together with one mind and purpose.

Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves.  

Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.

You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.

Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. When he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal’s death on a cross. Philippians 2:1-8 NLT

  • Fantasizing about power, success and attractiveness

Biblical Response: So Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers in this world lord it over their people, and officials flaunt their authority over those under them.

But among you it will be different. Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant,  and whoever wants to be first among you must be the slave of everyone else. For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:42-45 NLT

  • Exaggerating your achievements or talents

Biblical Response: Then the people of Ephraim asked Gideon, “Why have you treated us this way? Why didn’t you send for us when you first went out to fight the Midianites?” And they argued heatedly with Gideon.

But Gideon replied, “What have I accomplished compared to you? Aren’t even the leftover grapes of Ephraim’s harvest better than the entire crop of my little clan of Abiezer? God gave you victory over Oreb and Zeeb, the commanders of the Midianite army. What have I accomplished compared to that?”

When the men of Ephraim heard Gideon’s answer, their anger subsided. Judges 8:1-3 NLT

  • Expecting regular praise and admiration.

Biblical Example: Herod put on his royal robes, sat on his throne, and made a speech to them.  The people gave him a great ovation, shouting, “It’s the voice of a god, not of a man!”

Instantly, an angel of the Lord struck Herod with a sickness, because he accepted the people’s worship instead of giving the glory to God. Acts 12:21-23 NLT

  • Believing that you deserve special treatment

Biblical Response: When Jesus noticed that all who had come to the dinner were trying to sit in the seats of honor near the head of the table, he gave them this advice:  “When you are invited to a wedding feast, don’t sit in the seat of honor. What if someone who is more distinguished than you has also been invited?  The host will come and say, ‘Give this person your seat.’ Then you will be embarrassed, and you will have to take whatever seat is left at the foot of the table!

“Instead, take the lowest place at the foot of the table. Then when your host sees you, he will come and say, ‘Friend, we have a better place for you!’ Then you will be honored in front of all the other guests.  For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.” Luke 14:7-11 NLT

  • Failing to recognize other people’s emotions and feelings

Biblical Response: Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep.  Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all! Romans 12:15-16 NLT

  • Expecting others to go along with your ideas and plans

Biblical Response: Without wise leadership, a nation falls; there is safety in having many advisers. Proverbs 11:14 NLT

  • Taking advantage of others

Biblical Counsel: Look here, you rich people: Weep and groan with anguish because of all the terrible troubles ahead of you. Your wealth is rotting away, and your fine clothes are moth-eaten rags.  Your gold and silver have become worthless. The very wealth you were counting on will eat away your flesh like fire. This treasure you have accumulated will stand as evidence against you on the day of judgment.  For listen! Hear the cries of the field workers whom you have cheated of their pay. The wages you held back cry out against you. The cries of those who harvest your fields have reached the ears of the Lord of Heaven’s Armies. James 5:1-4 NLT

  • Expressing disdain for those you feel are inferior

Biblical Example: Then Jesus told this story to some who had great confidence in their own righteousness and scorned everyone else: “Two men went to the Temple to pray. One was a Pharisee, and the other was a despised tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed this prayer: ‘I thank you, God, that I am not a sinner like everyone else. For I don’t cheat, I don’t sin, and I don’t commit adultery. I’m certainly not like that tax collector! I fast twice a week, and I give you a tenth of my income.’

“But the tax collector stood at a distance and dared not even lift his eyes to heaven as he prayed. Instead, he beat his chest in sorrow, saying, ‘O God, be merciful to me, for I am a sinner.’  I tell you, this sinner, not the Pharisee, returned home justified before God. For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.” Luke 18:9-14 NLT

  • Being jealous of others

Biblical Response by Paul: Agrippa interrupted him. “Do you think you can persuade me to become a Christian so quickly?”

Paul replied, “Whether quickly or not, I pray to God that both you and everyone here in this audience might become the same as I am, except for these chains.” Acts 26:28-29 NLT 

(When Paul had Jesus, He did not want anything King Agrippa had. He wanted Agrippa to have what He had!)

  • Believing that others are jealous of you

Biblical Example: And David spake to the men that stood by him, saying, What shall be done to the man that killeth this Philistine, and taketh away the reproach from Israel? for who [is] this uncircumcised Philistine, that he should defy the armies of the living God? And the people answered him after this manner, saying, So shall it be done to the man that killeth him.

And Eliab his eldest brother heard when he spake unto the men; and Eliab’s anger was kindled against David, and he said, “Why camest thou down hither? and with whom hast thou left those few sheep in the wilderness? I know thy pride, and the naughtiness of thine heart; for thou art come down that thou mightest see the battle.”

And David said, “What have I now done? [Is there] not a cause?”  1 Samuel 17:26-29

  •  Having trouble keeping healthy relationships

Biblical Counsel: A man [that hath] friends must show himself friendly: and there is a friend [that] sticketh closer than a brother. Proverbs 18:24

  •  Aspiring to the position of someone above you

Biblical Example: 
“How you are fallen from heaven, O shining star, son of the morning! 
You have been thrown down to the earth, 
you who destroyed the nations of the world. 
For you said to yourself, 
‘I will ascend to heaven and set my throne above God’s stars. 
I will preside on the mountain of the gods far away in the north. 
I will climb to the highest heavens 
and be like the Most High.’ 
Instead, you will be brought down to the place of the dead, 
down to its lowest depths. Isaiah 14:12-15 NLT

  • Feeling easily hurt and rejected

Christ’s Example: He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were [our] faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not. Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted. But he [was] wounded for our transgressions, [he was] bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace [was] upon him; and with his stripes we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the LORD hath laid on him the iniquity of us all.  Isaiah 53:3-6

  • Having a fragile self-esteem

Biblical Example: And the women answered [one another] as they played, and said, Saul hath slain his thousands, and David his ten thousands .And Saul was very wroth, and the saying displeased him; and he said, They have ascribed unto David ten thousands, and to me they have ascribed [but] thousands: and [what] can he have more but the kingdom?  

And Saul eyed David from that day and forward.  1 Samuel 18:7-9

  • Wanting to appear tough-minded or unemotional

Biblical Promise: And I will give them one heart, and I will put a new spirit within you; and I will take the stony heart out of their flesh, and will give them an heart of flesh:  Ezekiel 11:19

If you see yourself here, or someone you have to deal with on a regular basis, you may need to seek professional counseling. (Here is some helpful advice on dealing with a narcissistic boss.)

We may be tempted to be narcissistic in some very ordinary circumstances. For instance, a while back, a friend of mine was flying from Tampa to Chicago every week on a work assignment. At the end of a certain week he was tired and ready for a quiet and relaxing plane ride home. It wasn’t going to happen. That day a large group got on the plane who were having a big noisy celebration of some kind. Instead of getting angry or upset, my friend who was already tired, just sighed and smiled, as he told himself, “Apparently today is not about me.”

In many cases, the cure may just be that simple. Remember that “It’s not all about me.”

For the disciples it was a little more complex than that. They had rivalries and arguments over which one would be the greatest in the coming Kingdom. It wasn’t until they saw Jesus on the cross willing to die the second death and go into total oblivion that they then lost their narcissistic tendencies and became selfless and meek like John the Baptist who said, 

He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less. John 3:30 NLT 

The disciples overcame self and narcissism when they did what John the Baptist suggested years earlier. 

“Look! The Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world! John 1:29 NLT 

See more http://ssnet.org/blog/bible-cures-for-narcissism/

Overcoming the Spirit of Narcissism

“But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good, treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these. For among them are those who enter into households and captivate weak women weighed down with sins, led on by various impulses, always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.”

II Timothy 3:1-7 (NASB)

*****

At this stage in history; for anyone to deny that we are in the Last Days, is to reveal a gross measure of ignorance and a corresponding lack of spiritual discernment.  We are in fact in the last days, and the above excerpt of scripture underscores but one of many excerpts of scripture which are unfolding before our eyes.

Here in the West, to be a “lover of self” in the context of the prophecy above, is to be a Narcissist, by way of contemporary and generalized definition. The essence or roots of narcissism is a spiritual dynamic however, versus that of a clinical, secular designation. The secular designation therefore, is that of an attempt to define what is in actuality a demonic stronghold–the more advanced stronghold of which we will discuss shortly (Covert Narcissism).

Demons only inhabit a person when they’ve received a figurative license or invitation to do so.  And in the instance of narcissism, I have observed the invitation and/or license to typically come through 3 primary avenues, as reflective of my protracted experience not only as a counselor, but also as a self-inflicted victim at one stage in my life.

These 3 avenues are as follows:

1) That of a deep and unhealed wound wrought of neglect, abandonment and/or rejection.

2) That of the deeply-seated and prolonged suppression of unresolved sin, and, correspondingly, unresolved guilt, which is exacerbated by demonic condemnation.

3) The very dangerous state of “lukewarmness” as a Believer, spoken of in Revelation 3:16. For it is as we steadily ignore the gentle prodding of the Holy Spirit to cultivate intimacy with the Lord ongoing, and we thereafter resist His subsequent chastening, that we are released to our own devices and subject to a specific form of judgement in the form of mental illness spoken of in 2 Thessalonians 2:11: “…for this reason God will send upon them a deluding influence…”.  The initial context of this verse speaks to non-Believers who continue to believe what is false.  I tend to believe it speaks more pointedly of those who instinctively knowthat what they are embracing is false.  I have equally observed this dynamic played-out in the lives of thousands of Believers as well, over several decades.

In the case of the rejection and abandonment wound, narcissism serves initially as a form of self-preservation, which takes on the form of serving and affirming one’sself–in the absence of such from others.  Over time, self-absorption grows. As it does, the door to our soul that was initially only slightly ajar, is ultimately flung wide-open, following which the demon of narcissism (i.e., obsessive love of self, in its base form) waltzes-in, unpacks its bags, sets-up camp, stretches its legs, and cultivates a multifaceted stronghold.

In the case of the prolonged suppression of unresolved sin, and corresponding terminal guilt and associated condemnation; one is predisposed to fabricating a hyper-spiritual exterior, whereby a person perpetually sells the world on their divine attributes and their super-human qualities, thus disarming any potential question otherwise. One thereafter perpetually seeks to draw attention to themselves, affording a perpetual spotlight under which they may continue to sell their hyper-spiritual state to the world about them.  As long as they continue to successfully sell all others about them, they successfully defer any potential scrutiny or questioning as to what may lay beneath.  Over time, the person ultimately “closes the sale” on their very selves–whereas the fabricated superficial or hyper-self becomes their reality.  At this stage, gross self-absorption ensues, along with deeply entrenched deceit and delusion.

And lastly, in the case of those straddling the fence of their faith, and marinating lives of lukewarmness by attempting to allow wanton carnality and marginal faith in Christ to “sleep in the same bed” together; a blanket invitation is released for the tentacles of 2 Timothy 3:1-7 to envelope their lives.  For the present reality is that the spiritual war being waged about us is far more dangerous than the average Believer can fathom.  And until we resolve to perpetually cling the Lord in daily intimacy with Him; while also through corresponding necessity, “dying daily” to our carnal selves; we willfully wander out from under the protective “shadow of His wings” (Psalm 91), and stumble into enemy fire–not unlike that of willfully wandering into enemy machine gun fire on a contemporary military battlefield. The end result of which is that of being riddled with bullet-like seeds of demonic infestation.

Deliverance from the above variations of narcissistic strongholds typically occurs in one of two ways: Firstly, and following the acknowledgement of one’s condition and the resolve to repent; opting to team with someone in deliverance ministry, to cast-out the roots of this mangy critter, followed thereafter by a willful turning (teshuvah) in the opposite direction.  And secondly, through self-deliverance.  James 4:7 says that “…if we resist the devil he will flee.”  This is the essence of self-deliverance–resisting (starving) the demon until he gets tired and moves on to the next house.

Self-deliverance is quite simple.  Below I will outline some cursory steps for performing such:

1) Establish a schedule of concerted fasting and prayer, perhaps for a few days leading up to a pre-scheduled time for your self-deliverance.  During this brief time of fasting and prayer (ideally a period of 3 days or more), and which can be a partial-fast; pray that the Holy Spirit reveal the tentacles of this stronghold, that you will have a focused inventory of what to renounce as you perform self-deliverance.

2)  As you engage your self-deliverance session, begin by taking communion, and reading John 6:51-58 (from a physical bible–will explain why, in a moment).  As you ingest the elements, ask the Lord to further free you from the Tree of the Knowledge and Good and Evil, and to further attach you to the Tree of Life–Y’shua (Jesus).

After first reading the excerpt from John, follow such with the elements.  Leave your bible open to this passage, and press it against your heart.  Hereafter, close your eyes, and proceed to breathe-in deeply, in through the nose, and out through the mouth.

3)  As you maintain the above posture, and with your eyes closed, picture in your mind’s-eye the Cross of Christ, and thereafter focus upon that image.  As you do so, verbally renounce the Spirit of Narcissism, while continuing to breathe deeply, in through your nose, and out through your mouth. Declare to it the authority of the Blood of Y’shua, and His Cross.  You can use the name of Jesus if you wish; I simply prefer Y’shua for deeply personal reasons, but of course Y’shua and Jesus are the same Person, and the demons know Him by both names (smiling).

4)  As you repeatedly exhale, the many tentacles of the Spirit of Narcissism will loosen, and will be expelled.  This process generally does not take more than 15 minutes or so. They often exit by making a person repeatedly yawn, belch, sneeze, cough or even flatulate.

5)  Following this session of communion and renunciation, do business with the Lord, by asking the Holy Spirit to invade those places in your spirit and soul which were previously manipulated by the demonic; invite Him to take full-habitation of your heart, and to thereafter guard-against re-habitation.  Ask Him to water the seeds of the authentic  Fruit of the Spirit in your heart (Galatians 5:22-24), which will counter the counterfeit components that were previously at work. The key is that to replace, not to keep vacant (see Matthew 12:43-45).  Our goal is to welcome the full habitation of the Holy Spirit’s working in our hearts, not to “sweep” our hearts clean, leaving them empty, as thereafter the “critters” will waltz right back, and wreck the house worse than before.

*****

Wholly counter to the above approach to self-deliverance, secular psychology and psychiatry seeks to remedy narcissism with a Cognitive approach, which attempts to free a person from the outside-in, through a change in thinking and outward behavior, when in fact the issue resides in our heart(s), and to be more specific: our heart-wound(s).  The only true freedom from such a stronghold is that from the inside-out, by addressing thespiritual component–which governs our cognition.  It is because of the above “ships passing in the night,” that tens of millions of people in the West have submitted themselves to secular counseling and therapy, as well as psychotropic meds, for much of their adult lives perhaps, to thereafter discover that near the end of their lives they had never been set-free of the strongholds their therapists had artfully masked through secular-humanistic “therapy” and medication, all the while reaping the spoils of insurance billing revenues.  Hello?

One of the more advanced forms of narcissism is categorized by secular therapists as “Covert Narcissism.”  In general terms, the secular definition does a fair job of defining the characteristics of such.  However, and again, their approach to addressing such is wholly useless in weeding-up and casting-out the demonic tentacles of such, which are very crafty about hiding within the deep recesses of our hearts during secular therapy, only to reappear down the road.

I have pasted below, a brief video addressing Covert Narcissism, which, again, is but one way to describe what is simply an advanced form of narcissism.  As you view this brief video, and as you would experience pangs of conviction (defined by Holy Spirit nudging or tugging within your soul), you may very well have such the stronghold. If so, there’s no need to panic.  Simply commit to the above process of self-deliverance and kick this “critter” out of your life, and be done with it.  Once freed, do your best to repair the damage to those you’ve alienated and wounded, by more deeply embracing the Crucified Life; daily dying to sell

See more http://teshuvahtzion.com/overcoming-narcissism/